What do I mean, when I say marriage coaching? What is the purpose of this endeavour?

 

 

When I was going through difficulties in my own marriage, I barely got any help. I found myself getting traditional advice which didn’t speak to me, one bit. The professional “marriage counsellors” whether they be in private practice or court appointed ones were equally unsatisfactory. I realised there exists a huge gap between traditional ideas of a marriage and my idea of a good marriage.

 

 

I spent considerable time thinking that perhaps I was wrong, or different. A classic case of exceptionalism, that I outgrew very fast when I interacted with tons of people facing similar dilemmas. I realised that most millenials (or even others) were not happy with the dogmatic and ‘one-size fits all’ approach of marriage counselling that was prevalent, around.

 

 

From there, I began – I began reading, studying and speaking with clients. My work as a lawyer gave me tons of opportunities to speak with my clients and understand their difficulties. My approach ended up helping them not just legally, but over and above that. I interacted with many couples through medico-legal consultancy. I also counselled surrogates to help them deal with the changes and struggles of commercial surrogacy.

 

 

My approach through this, is relational – it is nuanced. Through the coaching sessions, you will get tools to communicate better, reduce the polarisation, rekindle desire and discover as well as resolve specific sources of conflicts.

 

 

What I will Help With

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1. Understanding the nature of the conflicts (with focus on clear thinking )

2. De-escalation – identifying the actionables

3. Repositioning yourself in the conflict

4. Reframing individual needs and voicing the other’s needs

5.  Coaching with emotional expression – Developing empathy

6. Integration – Using new communication skills and other techniques learnt

 

 

At the end of the coaching sessions, my goal is to empower you to resolve your conflicts, change the narrative of your marriage story to your satisfaction, and help you hold on with happiness.

 

 

Practically, my sessions include, individual as well as couple’s coaching, together. The range of therapeutic techniques utilized are, among others –

 

 

1. Cognitive behavioural therapy and Rational emotive behavioural therapy

2. Journal therapy

3. Couple’s worksheets

4. Narrative techniques

5. Techniques to refine critical thinking

 

 

Through marriage coaching I aim to provide my clients with a new approach and point of view, to see the relationship more objectively. I aim to reduce polarisation so my clients can communicate without bitterness and blame. I address situations that involve emotional unavailability, loneliness, loss, sorrows, disharmony and discord. Through my sessions, I help my clients address the dysfunction and bring about the change necessary to nurture and strengthen their relationship